Biggest Loser: Blue vs. Black and putting yourself first

Biggest Loser (finally) returned after the Olympics and so many odd things happened. Let’s dive in.

1) The temptation challenge. I guess NBC didn’t get the rights to any of the temptation foods because everything had a weird name. Hershey kisses were called “chocolate treats”. Rice Krispy Treats were “a crispy treat.” Reeses Peanut Butter Cup? Nope, they had “Chocolate and Peanut Butter Treat.” Come on.

2) Michael. He wanted to play the game. Fine. He split up the teams. Fine.

But his logic was, “I’m finally putting myself first.” He kept saying that! Now, maybe I am being weight-ist, but I don’t think you can reach 500 lbs without putting yourself first. Right? Also, I never like when someone tries to hide their real reasons for doing something behind a life lesson or, in Michael’s case, just utter bullsh*t. If I were on the blue team I would have thrown the weigh in and booted Michael. Yeah, I said it!

Wait, I’m confused….

When I first heard about a movie called “Percy Jackson and the Olympians” I immediately assumed it was about a middle aged male black R&B singer who decided late in life to take up the sport of curling and eventually win a gold medal. I was IN.

But Now I see it’s just a caucasian son of Zeus coming into his powers and 007 in a terrible wig?

I’m IN!

Miles – LOST/Murphy Brown/Golden Girls

I just wrote about Miles on LOST and that made me think of other characters named Miles. Who’s the best?

1) Miles – LOST – Can speak to dead people and he’s funny and he’s still around.

2) Miles – Murphy Brown – Stressed out, married Corky. Disappeared?

3) Miles – Golden Girls – Frugal, dated Rose, then married somone else on the spinoff? When did they break up?

Clearly Miles from LOST right? Miles from Murphy Brown was a spaz and Miles from Golden Girls wasn’t even really named Miles – he was mob accountant Nicholas Carbone (and then briefly Jacob Plankmaker).

Lost – Miles to go

Yo! Okay, so LOST: THE FINAL SEASON (did they officially change the name of the show and I missed it?) is underway. We’re 5 hours in. I have a few thoughts.

1) Me like Rose! (And Bernard is fine or whatever.) So I was glad we got some of her this season. Twice! Wa-hoo! Although let’s see her on that island and not just in LA dying of cancer and telling John Lock to man up.

2) I could use some more Miles.

I like Miles. I like him more than most of the rest of them (Hurley, I am talking about you especially.) I hope he gets more to do than say one funny thing and just hang around the temple with no interest in what any of his friends are doing. But but but, shouldn’t he have been shot when they got to the temple in the first place? Why would he have been on the list inside the thing inside the guitar case? He was never touched by Jacob (that we know of) and he wasn’t on the original Oceanic flight. He must factor into something big coming up or else they would have gotten rid of him but it does kind of seem like his character fulfilled his purpose already last season. But I still love ya Miles!

3) Ever notice how sometimes the island is this big sprawling place where people (Rose/Bernard, Rousseau, Claire, etc) can live all alone not bothered by anyone for YEARS and other times it’s like the hallways of a very small high school (“Oh hey Kate! Filling up your water bottle and looking for Claire? Nice seeing you! Me and Jack are off to the Lighthouse. See you after 5th period.”) I know its a TV show (and a MAGICAL PLACE) so I guess that’s ok.

Jennifer Leather is the devil. Jennifer Garner IN leather gets a pass. Barely!

Jennifer Leather is terrible. Never order from them. And if you have to, stay away from the Totowa outlet and Dolores the manager. Terrible! She accused me of being rude and I accused her of being incompetent. We were both right!

As I write this I am on hold with the Service Center. For 24 minutes and counting! Gargh!

Now, here’s Jennifer Garner in leather (I would assume from the movie Elektra but who knows…)

Joan Allen – SAG awards

Dear Joan Allen, I know it must be hard for an actress of a certain age in Hollywood. Your string of drama hits and award attention of the late 90s may have dried up a little. But keep at it. You are a cool lady. Remember when you masturbated in the bathtub and the tree caught on fire? Stop with the plastic surgery. This was you at the SAG awards

Kind of embarrassing. Age gracefully. You are still cool though, Joan Allen.
-the world

Kleenex Get Mommed

This is all sorts of terrible.

Best Little Whorehouse in Texas…

This is a good movie. It’s about a whorehouse in TX and the zany things they go through. In the above clip, Miss Mona (Dolly Parton) is telling a room full of johns (and, presumably, the audience) how here whores are classy whores and not bad whores. Starting at 01:54 we hear about Miss Mona’s special no-no rules. One of the first ones is no tattoos because, “brands belong on cattle and that ain’t what we’re selling at Miss Monas.” BUT, the girl singing that line has a tattoo on her shoulder!

Oh irony, thy name is Best Little Whorehouse in Texas…

Biggest Loser

I really like The Biggest Loser. But how many times can their friends/family back home throw them a huge party whenever they come visit home from the ranch? Every episode it’s like “And here’s your FAMILY! And FRIENDS! And BALLOONS!”

Whatever. Team Liz!

Survivor’s Natalie vs. Project Runway’s Althea

Are they same person?

Althea

Natalie

Eh, all white people look the same to me.