Big Brother 12 (!) New Rankings

Updated Rankings! I’ll say this about ‘Big Brother’. It makes you FEEL things about these people. Most of them bad. Here is who is least to most annoyingly awful. NOTE: Only current house guests. Although, I kind of liked Rachel by the end and hated Kristin.

8. Lane – I like this guy. When he’s not being a little petty, he’s pretty funny. He’s in on the I’m-a-hick joke, right? Lane’s ok in my book.

7. Enzo – Oh, God. I know, I’m sorry. But he’s not really that bad.

6. Brendon – He has weird, black, soul-less eyes. “This is for you Rachel!”

5. Britney – Really, she’s kind of funny. But she can be too mean. And too two faced. Everyone is two faced but she brings it to another level.

4. Hayden – Stop shouting!

3. Kathy – Kathy doesn’t even realize Kathy is still in the house.

2. Matt – Something is off about him. Not the lying about his wife’s illness or the constant referring to himself as a genius, but something else. He’s icky.

1. Ragan – He’s the worst. So dramatic and spoiled and rude. You can get whiplash watching people go from underdog depressed to cocky frontrunner to devastated nominee.

Why do I care!?!? Come back Janelle!

Blackberry Barber Shop Commericial

This commercial drives me crazy. A phone has revolutionized how you cut hair because you want to one up all your barber shop friends across the country? Come on! Fail.

Big Brother 12 (!) Contestants RANKING

I still like Big Brother. I know, It’s the worst. The only thing worse than watching the show are the actual people on the show. After 3 weeks, here’s who’s left (in order from least to most horrific.)

11. Kristin – I guess? I like that she doesn’t ever speak. Ever. But she doesn’t seem like a terrible person. I suppose never (ever!) speaking will do that for you. Points taken away for hooking up with Hayden. Points added for keeping it a secret.

10. Andrew – Mazel Tov! He’s annoying but has become less annoying. There’s always one contestant like that a year (Remy! Sheila!). I think he’ll stick around for a while (although he’s on the block this week).

9. Lane – “I wanted to punch him in the face, in a good way.” And he likes to role play with animals. Oh, Lane.

8. Rachel – I can’t decide if I like her or hate her. She yells in the diary room but she reminds me of Janelle (oh Janelle!)

7. Britney – She’s actually kind of funny, no?

6. Raygan – He’s ok, I guess. But did you notice how much he was complimenting himself after the HoH competition and saying things like, “You’re a hero for staying on so long,” and “This is for everyone who bullied me in high school.” the eff?

5. Brenden – He’s getting on my nerves. So whiny. AND Brenden, by the way, there are not 2 sides to the house. There is everyone and then there’s you and Rachel. I like underdogs but not egotistical underdogs.

4. Matt – I liked him until he got HoH. And stop saying you are a genius. He’s a weird little mole of person. Amiright?

3. Kathy – I believe she’s actually still stuck in the caramel.

2. Hayden – STOP SHOUTING IN THE DIARY ROOM. Every year there’s one of those too. (Dan. Yvette.) Are the producers telling them to speak up. They have to be right? I want to be a fly on the wall of that diary room for one day.

1. Enzo – There’s glimmers that he is not just one huge, terrible, stereotype that was only put on to be very Jersey (well, ‘Jersey Shore’ Jersey at least.) But only glimmers.

Summer With Bravo commercials

These. Are. The. Worst.

And then I killed myself.

Big Brother 12 – Saboteur. Oh, goodness. Here we go again.

Big Brother is back and better the same as ever. Some thoughts.

1) Kathy is the saboteur right? Or are they just editing it to make it look like it’s her? That whole thing with the food competition was really damning for her. Also, I love how she the “old” one on the show at 40. 40!

2) There are not black people. Monet is the lighted skinned black person since Lisa Bonet. Bonet/Monet? Is this another twist, BB?

3) Andrew is weird. God bless him. I don’t think he’s the Saboteur, just a really weird guy.

4) Who cringed when one of those guys (I think it was the Mensa one!) made an alliance and said something like, “This is the strongest alliance in the history of Big Brother.” Famous last words.

5) Speaking of the alliance, Enzo needs to go. I get it. Jersey is popular so they wanted an Italian from Jersey. Come on. And Enzo, naming one person “The Beast” and another “The Animal” is pretty much the same thing.

True Beauty. Shoot me. (But don’t stab me Vanessa Minnillo)

First off, I know it’s my bad for even watching this show. (I don’t really! It’s just that sometimes its on Hulu and I have time to kill. I need to rethink my priorities if I can a) find time to watch this, b) get worked up enough to write a post about it.) This show is horrible. And so inconsequential I can’t even find a picture to post here of the 2nd season.

But I digress. The concept is get 10 “attractive” people under the guise of some fake competition (“Face of Vegas” is this year’s) and then judge them on inner beauty. What a crock of sh*t. Besides the challenges being so dumb and the justifications for getting rid of people being arbitrary, I think I have the biggest problem with the hosts/”judges”: Vanessa Minnillo, Carson Kressley, and Beth Stern. As if they are some huge arbiters of inner beauty.

there is no hope for the future

Really, Vanessa? Also, stop saying, “I’ve set up a surprise for them.” You had nothing to do with it. Come on, Stabatha!

And Beth Stern wouldn’t last a second as a contestant. “In my 25 years as a model…”

This show gets me heated!

Oh, and the producers are Ashton Kutcher and Tyra Banks. So, suddenly everything makes sense.

I like that Tom Bergeron.

He’s made a career of being your goofy uncle. And, he’s not unfunny at all. Good you for him!

New Fall TV Shows – What’s in a Name?: “Lonestar”

For the next little bit, I will be going over the names of some of this fall’s new crop of TV shows and, based solely on the title say what the show sounds like it SHOULD be about. Today – “Lonestar”, a new FOX drama??

What it SHOULD be about: Set in TX, the series is about a mid-20s young man who, after he catches his wife cheating on him with his best friend, decides to pursue his dreams of being an actor. He rebuilds his life in town while trying to become a star. A lone star.

What it is actually about: Follows a charismatic and brilliant schemer who has entangled himself in a deep, complex web from which he can’t break free. (from Pop Tower)

I now pronounce you Fran and Wife.

I have to admit I was surprised to go on Yahoo News today and find that Fran Drescher was the number two trending topic. You know, the nasal voice, midriff baring firecracker from Queens?  Seems that she has come forward with an exclusive interview to In Touch to say that her ex-husband was actually gay. Long a supporter of gay rights, she did not know until they divorced. Is anyone surprised? I mean look at him!

The man was a Broadway producer who was obsessed with his hair. He never once fell for CeCe’s womanly ways and, while I admit she beefed up for a few seasons, the lady had a great rack. He was even pulling away from Fran on their wedding day….

Hmm? What’s that? What do you mean that Fran and Mr. Sheffield weren’t actually a couple? I thought it was like Lucy and Ricky.

Thank you for clearing that up. And by “clearing that up” I mean ripping my heart out.

R.I.P. Rue McClanahan

Without a doubt, the most over looked and underestimated Golden Girl, Rue McClanahan was really awesome. She was f*cking funny.